help

i am not deniz. if i were him i would smile and put a hand on your shoulder and say good to see you. perhaps this would not be your preferred form of greeting. if deniz were here, he’d reveal his flaws to you quickly.

he has many flaws. he would prefer i do not enumerate them, but he’s not here. he hasn’t been here in a very long time.

he is indecisive and unfocused. his armpits get wet whenever he speaks to strangers or to friends. yet, this does not quiet him.

his attempts at humor often fail. he claims he would rather fail repeatedly than stop trying. he never acknowledges that many fail without such off-putting results.

sometimes he thinks he’s very profound. he thinks acknowledging that he thinks this and grinning and winking will defend him against the criticism that he is not actually very profound at all. one tires of this.

driven by his inflamed ego, deniz has left here artifacts of his existence. as if he is more important than others. dismissing the lives that were not given a chance to be seen. swimming in the filth of his privilege. as if his life was worth knowing.

maybe one day deniz will return. then we will know there is no god.